Sunday, July 17, 2011

..if this isn't a meltdown, i don't know what is hahah..

1. Hands down, I am this world, and this lifetime's BIGGEST fool. I mean, so what did I expect? (insert Neil Gayman's quote below). I am so upset I'm crying but I hate this feeling and thought I should get busy. So what do I do? I get up and proceeded to organize the clothes in my closet. But damn! I couldn't stop the tears, so I'm picking up clothes and hanging them while crying. Mad. Shortly thereafter, I look at myself in the mirror, and I saw how my eyes are already puffy, and I tell myself  "get a hold of yourself.." I have some errands to do in an hour, important errands and I can't go out looking like this. So I try to stop crying already but then I think of "the situation"  and the tears starts to well up, again. ahhhh this is just soooo messy. I don't ever want to have to go through this "situation" again.  Now, I'm having  a hard time typing cos I can't see through the tears. ah, (insert cuss word)!!!

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.. an hour later.

I hate the feeling of being in love. or maybe of hurting because of it. It's like the worst feeling ever. And I've  told myself countless times not to let someone have this much control,  this much effect on me. But see, my heart never ever fuc#in' listen. I wish I could grab it out of my chest. What a nuisance.

.. still several hours later.

Ok, we all have this moment, haha meltdown-emote-drama moment. But as always, it passes. And then I'm just thinking I'm hurt not because of XXXX per se but because I am soo disappointed. I always try to expect the best in people and when it turns out I expected wrong, it hurts. What a letdown. Oh well, I'll live.

.. a day after.

Ok, so I didn't die haha. and I had to edit the title of this post cos it's too funny lol. For some reason, the situation sorted  itself out. I don't know, could be just a misunderstanding? lol but if it happens again, i'll just repost this. ^___^ i hope not though. *crosses fingers8

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